Im sorry, I haven't been thinking straight lately

We turned into the intersection as a blue truck sped toward us, the girl in my passenger seat screamed, I slammed on the breaks and protectively put my arm in front of her. Grabbing onto her as his headlights collided with mine. We jolted forward as our cars slammed into each other. He was going 40, I was going 10. My hood bent up at an awkward angle and his headlights bounced off the engine in my car. It all happened in slow motion and I still couldn't do anything.

A text I sent to her. 
To the girl sitting in my shot gun:
Last night felt like deja vu. I don't know of what though. 
Just the part of you screaming and me grabbing you and the jolting part. 
Felt like i've done that before. 
And I feel like I can't function anymore. 
And did you see the way his car filled with smoke? 
Did you notice how slow everything was? 
Did you see my radiator bleeding out all over the asphalt? 
I feel like I will never move on from this. 
I feel like I won't have a moment without thinking about it. 
I don't pray very often. 
But I have talked to God so many times today 
about how grateful I am that everyone is okay. 
I am so sorry. 
Are you emotional about this? 
Because I am.

It doesn't feel real, it feels like a dream. And this is a problem. Nothing feels real anymore. I used to be scared of everything and I would feel my emotions too hard. So I taught myself that most things aren't going to kill me, and if they do, so what?..  

During movies when I'm getting too emotionally invested, I breathe and tell myself it's not real. I no longer cry during romance movies, The Notebooks not even real, sorry to break it to you. 

Horror shows don't give me nightmares, 

Car crashed that feel like dreams give nightmares.

I'm scared I'm getting too detached from life, too detached from the events in my life. It scares me that everything feels like a dream now.